To Some Avail

I think I’d like to be successful in public once.

That’s a weird sentence to write.

I’ve been successful in private plenty of times. I’ve done difficult things. Made things I’m proud of. Had people I respect respect me. I’ve been useful. I’ve gotten shit done.

But I’ve never really put my foot on the gas for myself.

I’ve never said, fuck it, I’m going to make people notice this.

I’d like to know what that feels like.

Not forever. I don’t particularly want to become a person whose primary occupation is being seen. But I’ve never had the experience of really promoting something I made and watching it travel farther than I could carry it myself.

When this Tabletop Documentary drops I'm going to need to do that.

Which means I’m probably going to have to get comfortable taking up a little more space.

I don’t know if I’ll be good at it.

I’ve just decided I’d like to find out.